If your ex-partner refuses to follow a court-ordered parenting schedule in Ontario, you must never retaliate by withholding child support. Instead, document every missed visit and file a Motion to Enforce or a Motion for Contempt at the family court to legally restore your parenting time.
Being kept away from your children is one of the most painful experiences a parent can endure. In Ontario, family law heavily prioritizes the right of a child to have a meaningful relationship with both parents. When an ex-partner maliciously cancels visits or creates endless excuses to deny your scheduled parenting time, they are breaking the law. 📝
However, acting out of anger or trying to take the law into your own hands will only damage your case. The family courts in Ontario (formerly dealing with “access,” now legally termed “parenting time”) require you to follow strict legal procedures to enforce your rights.
This guide will explain exactly how to document the denial of parenting time, the difference between a Motion to Enforce and a Contempt motion, and why withholding child support is the biggest mistake you can make. We will also cover when it is time to hire a local family law firm to fight for your relationship with your child.
Step-by-Step Process in Ontario
Whether your parenting order was issued in Hamilton, London, Brampton, or anywhere else in Ontario, a court order is a legally binding command, not a mere suggestion. If one parent ignores it, the judge has the power to punish them severely. 📍
To get a judge to intervene, you must prove a consistent pattern of bad behaviour, not just a single misunderstanding over a weekend schedule.
Step 1: Check Your Legal Documentation
First, verify what type of agreement you have. Do you have a formal, signed Separation Agreement that was filed with the court, or an actual judge’s Order? ❗
If you only have a verbal agreement or text messages saying you can see the kids on weekends, the police and the courts cannot enforce it. You must first apply to the Superior Court of Justice or the Ontario Court of Justice to get a formal parenting order in place.
Step 2: Document Every Single Denied Visit
Evidence is everything in family court. You must keep a detailed, factual journal. Every time you are denied your scheduled parenting time, write down the date, time, and the excuse your ex gave.
Communicate strictly in writing (email or text message). If you show up to their house and no one answers the door, send a polite text saying: “I am outside for my scheduled parenting time at 5:00 PM as per our court order, but no one is answering.” Save these messages.
Step 3: Do Not Stop Paying Child Support
This is the most critical rule in Ontario family law. Child support and parenting time are two entirely separate legal issues. 💪
If your ex denies you parenting time, you must continue paying your full child support amount. If you retaliate by cutting off the money, the judge will view you as acting in bad faith, and the Family Responsibility Office (FRO) will suspend your driver’s licence or garnish your wages.
Step 4: File a Motion for Contempt of Court
If the pattern of denial continues, you must file a Motion in family court. You can file a Motion to Enforce the existing order, or in severe cases, a Motion for Contempt.
Contempt of court is a quasi-criminal finding. You are asking the judge to rule that your ex intentionally and willfully defied a court order. If the judge finds them in contempt, the judge can fine them, order them to pay your legal fees, order “make-up” parenting time, or even put them in jail in extreme circumstances.
How Much Does it Cost in Ontario?
Fighting a hostile ex-partner in court is not cheap, but enforcing your rights is necessary to maintain your bond with your child. If you successfully prove your ex is acting maliciously, the court may shift the financial burden onto them. 💰
Here is a breakdown of the typical costs for enforcing parenting time:
| Service / Action Type | Estimated Cost (CAD) | Who Pays? |
|---|---|---|
| Filing a Notice of Motion | $160 (Court Fee) | The Applicant |
| Lawyer (Drafting Contempt Motion) | $3,000 – $7,000+ | Paid out of pocket upfront |
| Private Family Mediator | $1,500 – $3,500+ Total | Usually split 50/50 |
| Cost Award (If Ex Loses) | Reimbursement of your legal fees | The losing Ex-partner |
Judges have very little patience for parents who play games with children. If the judge finds your ex in contempt, they frequently order the offending parent to pay a massive “cost award” to cover the thousands of dollars you spent hiring your lawyer.
How Long Does the Process Take?
If your ex denies you a single weekend visit, you generally cannot run to court the next morning. You must build a documented pattern over several weeks. ⏱
Once you file a Motion for Contempt or Enforcement, you enter the standard Ontario court backlog. Depending on your city, it typically takes 2 to 5 months to get a hearing date before a judge.
If the situation is truly an emergency—for example, your ex has completely cut off all contact for months and you fear they might flee the province—your lawyer can file an “Urgent Motion.” If a judge approves the urgency, you could be in front of the court in 7 to 14 days.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Will the police help enforce my parenting time?
Generally, no. Local police officers consider parenting schedules a civil family court matter and will not intervene just because your ex won’t open the door. The only exception is if your specific court order contains a “Police Enforcement Clause,” which explicitly authorizes law enforcement to physically retrieve the child.
What if my ex says the child doesn’t want to go?
Under Ontario law, it is the parent’s duty to encourage and facilitate the relationship. If a young child says they don’t want to go, the parent must still positively encourage the visit. However, if the child is an older teenager (e.g., 15 or 16), judges recognize that you cannot physically force a teenager into a car against their will.
Can I get make-up time for the weekends I missed?
Yes. If you successfully prove that you were wrongfully denied parenting time, the judge will frequently order “compensatory” or “make-up” parenting time. For example, if you missed two weekends, the judge may award you two extra weekends in the upcoming month.
Can I change decision-making responsibility if they keep denying me?
Yes. If one parent continually engages in severe parental alienation and flagrantly ignores court orders, a judge can completely reverse the parenting arrangement. The judge may strip the offending parent of decision-making responsibility and award it entirely to you.
Should I hire a law firm for a Contempt Motion?
Yes, absolutely. A Contempt of Court motion has a very high burden of proof because the penalties (including jail time) are so severe. A local family law firm knows exactly how to draft the specialized affidavits required to prove intentional, willful defiance of a court order.
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